March 31, last day of intrams.
Sunday, March 31, 2024
The Day He Freakin' Confessed
Friday, March 22, 2024
A Quote From Someone Anonymously
"I think love is when I put myself even when I'm tired, and I carry myself up the stairs even though my knees ache. I think love is when I buy myself a coffee when I'm broke, and I know that I'll get myself back later. I think love is letting myself love someone, even though I am so scared. Love is a heavy thing that carries you as much as you carry it."
Hmmm, to love someone so genuinely. Honestly, I never wanted na ma-reciprocate yung feelings ko sakanya. Alam mo yun? Para bang masaya na ako dati na nakikita ko siya araw-araw. Masaya akong masaya siya. Ngayon kaya, sa mga panahong ito, okay na kaya siya? I honestly don't know how anxiety feels like. Being anxious, yes I know how it feels. But having and experiencing anxiety, I can't understand. But I chose to understand because that is how much I love him. I chose to let him go because that's what he wanted. We never even had a thing para may matapos in the first place 'di ba?
But every moments, every memories with him, na parang vague na ngayon, kasi hindi ko na siya nakakausap, nakikikita, parang iba na, at alam kong pareho na kaming nagbagong dalawa. It's been seven months since we stopped talking because that's what he asked for. Wala naman akong magagawa 'di ba? Kahit na mahal ko na yung tao, kung hindi na niya gusto, wala na naman akong laban.
Pero hanggang ngayon, kahit anong makita ko na tungkol sakanya, bigla ko siyang naaalala. Lord, bawal na po ba talaga? Lord bakit sa lahat ng taong nakilala ko, siya yung minahal ko? Siguro matagal ko nang tinatago ito sa puso ko. Masyadong busy sa school eh. Hindi naman pwe-pwedeng ma-distract ako dahil lang sa reason na "hanggang ngayon, kahit pitong buwan na yung nakakalipas, parang hindi pa rin naghihilom yung puso ko."
Haaay, Nissy, kailan ba tayo magiging maayos nito?
My Life Update So Far! (Emotionally)
Usapang puso naman tayo Nissy :)
Hi! Kumusta ka na, Nissy? It's been...seven months? Almost. Hmmm, kung sasabihin ko sa'yo genuinely yung nararamdaman ko ngayong oras na ito, I feel so... vulnerable and weak. Kapag ganitong time na wala na akong ginagawang kahit anong school works or acad related, iniisip ko kung okay na ba talaga ako. No words can totally describe what I am feeling. I am trying and trying to distract myself, pero once na ma-trigger, once na makakita ako ng kahit anong bagay na related sa kanya, I can't help myself. Siguro nga minahal ko yung tao kaya ako ganito. Kaya hanggang ngayon, nasasaktan pa rin ako... somehow. Not everyday, but during random days.
Medyo ewan ko na rin talaga ako sa sarili ko kung bakit ako naghahanap ng crush HAHAHAHA. Alam naman nating pareho na kapag ganitong mga sitwasyon, wala naman siyang magandang nadudulot sa'yo diba? He was just your distraction. Pero... pero Nissy, minahal ko kasi yung tao.
Haaay Nissy, bakit ang sakit pa rin? Kahit na wala na akong masyadong naaalala sa pinagsamahan naming dalawa, bakit ang sakit? Akala ko okay na ako, hindi ko na iniiyakan yung tao, pero nakita ko lang ulit once, wala na, bumaik na naman lahat. Ang unfair naman, bakit sa'ming dalawa, siya yung unang nakausad?
Tangina, mahal pa rin kita
Thursday, March 21, 2024
My Life Update So Far! (Academically)
To My Nik Whom I Love The Most
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Have the courage to let go of what is not right for you :) Hmm, tungkol saan naman kaya ang blog entry ko today? Actually kaya ako napa...
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"I think love is when I put myself even when I'm tired, and I carry myself up the stairs even though my knees ache. I think lov...
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A confession I had to make, Ever since I was grade 7, I felt like may something talaga na kakaiba sa'kin. Hindi ko lang masyadong pinans...
I Loved You, It Ruined My Life
Out of all Taylor Swift's songs, I relate to the Fortnight the most Today is July 1st, MONDAY. Before I start writing on this blog ent...
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